Numb Nuts

here's another short paragraph. and me and numb nuts are now friends. but he's still a numb nuts.

So my job in a nutshell is to transfer money for commercial closings but the closers are supposed to give me wiring instructions for every wire request they send me. Lately I’ve been going above and beyond to get their wires out when they say stupid stuff like “can you send Henry $4 million dollars?” Now come on-if I told you that would you have the slightest idea who Henry was and how to get him $4 million dollars? Probably not right? So of course I have to go back to them and say ask for the wiring instructions. One closer is totally oblivious and says he sent me the wiring instructions. I used to actually look for them in my old emails, now I just say “I can’t find them, can you resend them?” to which he never replies until one of his lackeys tracks them down for him and sends them to me. Well today I finally lost it…I had these instructions that were off by $1.27-which is NO big deal in the grand scheme of things EXCEPT that I have to account for every penny I send out and believe me it would take us 6 years to figure out why this file is off by $1.27 so I went back to my requestee and told him the issue. So he responds and tells me I really need to clear it up with his lender. HELLO!!! Remember a day back when you actually had to do something for your job? How in the heck did it become mine? So I wrote this scathing email to my boss telling him everything this numb nuts was asking me to do. Then I decided, in all of my coherent PMS-ness, that I would change all of the he-s to you-s in the email and send it directly to numb nuts. He immediately tucked his tail and responded with “I’m sorry, my bad.” See, being bitchy really can pay off.