Thursday, April 15, 2010

boundaries

this morning we were told that the birth parents want to have visits after the adoption is final. they are considering relinquishing on both kids which would mean it's easier for the uncle that has stepped forward because he wouldn't have to keep up with visit schedules. however, if he steps back and acknowledges that he can't do this we could adopt both kids this summer. if he doesn't back down-there's still a 50/50 chance they would split the kids up and peanut would go live with uncle. today is court for peanut. i don't expect to find out much about where things stand with uncle but for now i have to hope that his actions are speaking louder than his words. and then i have to hope and believe that social services is listening to what is speaking louder. yesterday was his last chance deadline for beginning his visits with peanut and he didn't make it. didn't call or make it. nobody knows why. today my case worker told me his visit schedule isn't what's important-it's his home study. but that if he's not making efforts that probably shows his intent. i'm all kinds of hopeful and confused and cautious all at once. please continue to pray that uncle's intentions are made known early on in the case and pray that he sees what it really takes to raise a newborn. a newborn who still could go for a bottle at 4:00am even though you just gave him one at 3:00am and 1:00am and 11:00pm. it's exhausting, let me tell you. and i look into that chubby little face and it looks back and smiles at me and i have to know i'm doing my #1 job: i'm teaching him bonding skills whether he gets to stay and bond with me forever or if he moves on and bonds again with someone new. let me tell you-SO HARD. love that little man and can't imagine what our birth parents are going through.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

It IS hard. I will keep everything crossed for you guys. The summer isn't that far away!