It's been a while

A lot has happened. Like...a lot.

We had a baby by birth. When #4 was 13 months old I realized I was pregnant. After 12 years of infertility, the most stubborn and determined sperm got through. He's amazing. All the kids are really.

Sweet Pea is now 11 and going into middle school. She's as even keel as the blue flames of hell.
Peanut is heading into 4th grade.
Both Babies (their collective nickname) are going into 2nd and they are hoping to be in the same class this coming year.
And Punkin Head will start kindergarten. In a button up shirt and tie of course. It will not match and he will not change it.

It's 2020 and we're in the middle of corona virus quarantines. I feel like updating the blog. I type better than I can handwrite and someday, I'm hoping, my kids will want to hear the stories of life in the middle of it.

This is hard. It's scary. We keep hearing about the second wave while grappling with all the rules of the first. It's not fun anymore. It's not puzzles and family time and new recipes because the store was out of _______.

It's being trapped with the same 7 people day in and day out. Shouting about picking up rooms and starting laundry and who's job was cleaning up the loft/living room...by the way who peed on the seat and left a turd unflushed. It's "if they have it at the store I'll get some."

On top of that, we're in the beginning of police reform. It's amazing and it's scary and it's justice and it's time and it's historic. And it's all so much. Hurt feelings and confusion and agreeing but coming from different sides. No one can say anything right.

I had to get off Facebook and as much as I love seeing what's going on with everyone I thought maybe I should try Instagram for a while. But then....I don't want to follow anyone. Well maybe twitter will be fun but then I can't find anyone. I'm an old dog trying to go through a self-help book on my own and I'm swimming in can't-do-it-rights.

Today was a really hard day. The kids are struggling with boredom. I'm struggling living in such a dusty mess all the time. I ask them for help with what, to me, feels like something so little but I forget that they can't reach the clothesline to get their clothes down or can't see all the hot wheels for the legos. It's all so much. I'm hoping tomorrows a better day because I've been trying to clean up one room for a solid 2 months now.

I started a little embroidery gig on the side. I enjoy it. It gives me an outlet to create. I make mostly memory things. When someone passes away I use their old clothes to make bears. Or I digitize their signature and embroidery that on top of a heart design. I love doing it. It's an emotional job but I'm not afraid of facing the dead. I get to spend a little time making something touching for those left behind.

Anyhow...I'll get back at more regular updates. I'll try not to wait 7 years before the next post. Who knows who still follows this but I'm mostly writing for my kids.