and cue hoarding. i refuse for this to be a "thing"!!

the last few days have been hectic around here. karyssa had more play therapy. i've been given a book to read and it's actually really helpful. it's called "beyond consequences". it's more for attachment issued kids, which we don't really have, buuuuuuut lately (since decembers birth family visits) we've been having a hard time throwing away wrappers. i watch hoarders with my jaw on my lap. so the thought that someday we could be going over to camera crews on karysssa's front lawn and dead cats buried under piles of newspaper clippings in the family room had me motivated. almost.
as she was leaving play therapy she wouldn't throw away the juice box her therapist had given her. the therapist looked at me and said "does she always have trouble throwing things away?" *sigh* "yes...treat wrappers, gum wrappers, that kind of thing." i had noticed it. i didn't want to face it yet. i didn't want it to be a "thing" we were going to have to deal with but it was out there now.
the book touched on hoarding so i tried it with karyssa. "i know you want to keep the wrapper because it reminds you of the treat, but just because you throw away the wrapper doesn't mean you have to throw away the treat...can mommy throw the wrapper away for you?" "ya." *whew*

today she started preschool. i sent her upstairs to pick out an outfit. later i went up to check on her and she came bolting out of her room, in a combination that made my eyes water, and said "i need a bow!" technically her outfit should have worked, flowers on bottom, butterflies on top but wow-totally different color schemes and styles. i didn't want her going to her first day looking like an elderly asian woman so i picked a couple plain patterned pants and she chose between them. thank goodness. i did good when it was time to leave. i lingered for a while but then i was starting to tear up. instead of sitting in the corner of the classroom clinching onto asher and sobbing silently i decided we'd better get while the going was good. i walked up and said quickly "see you in a few hours sweetie" and bolted quickly!! i cried all the way to the car. all the way out of the parking lot. and then took asher to the rec center for some one-on-one mommy and swimming time. i admit, i cried just a little bit in the pool. he LOVED it. although he's been itching ever since. poor guy and that dang eczema. afterwards i put him in childcare and worked out on my own. when i picked him up i said "you ready to go pick up karyssa?" and he shook his head no! HA! he LOVED karyssa being in school.

he's become SO opinionated. when karyssa poops on the potty she gets gum. well, asher thinks he deserves a piece just for being cute. i started it with chocolate chips so it's partially my fault that his cuteness reward has carried over when the ante got upped to gum. yesterday she pooped on the potty while he was still asleep. when he woke up and discovered she'd pooped with out him he stood under the gum cabinet crying until i clarified "so you think you deserve gum for karyssa pooping on the potty?" he stopped mid-sob and said "uh-huh." he got gum. tonight at dinner i cut his burger and he grabbed my fork and put his hand on his burger while letting out a blood curdling scream that i was actually CUTTING his burger. paul said "when did he get so opinionated?" i said "well, he is almost 2!" i guess it's time. this afternoon he cried off and on all afternoon. i finally put him in his room for quiet time. he played quietly up there until paul came home so i guess he just needed some time to himself. good thing we're gonna get a whole lotta momma time in the next few months.