i hate when i cry. HATE IT!

today we spoke at the banquet for our local CASA group. we were the main attraction. us. our family. our story.
i wrote out my script weeks ago. i read it over and over. i got up there and said something completely different and cried. in front of almost 300 people. i HATE crying in front of other people. i don't mind public speaking. i love it. i love telling people what's on my mind. but ugh. i HATE crying. i would have done fine but i mentioned how karyssa would let us know when she was hungry when she first came to us. and a woman on the front table burst into tears. UGH! if someone else cries, i cry. no matter how much i can't stand them, i cry. my mother-in-law and husband say i did great. but i could tell my voice was shaking and then when i burst into tears i'm not sure i did ok. and i didn't say anything i wanted to say. UGH! is there a re-do button around here somewhere?
just had to get that off my chest.